Wednesday, September 14, 2011
I love this little girl so much. her personality is really starting to show. everyday she does something new that surprises me. she has just started rolling her tongue and making fart noises. both totally melt my heart. 

She is getting so big. at night when i feed her it's so hard to imagine her fitting inside my belly. I wish I could slow down time. 


Last week another one of my friends moved away from Hawaii. I know i've said it before but it kills me to watch my friends go. This time was especially hard. 

When i moved to Hawaii 5 yrs ago. I didn't know a soul. It was a huge scary move and I never thought I would make it out here without my friends. I've always been blessed with incredible friends and they mean the world to me. I come from a super small family so my friends are totally family to me. Leaving them behind was super hard for me. 

A few months after I moved out here my best friend James followed suite. It was so good to have a familiar face around. Hawaii is more then perfect but it's nothing if you have no one to experience it with. It was just me and James for awhile until we started to make a small group of friends. That small but incredible group will always hold a special place in my heart. They helped define hawaii for me, taking this perfect place and making it home for me. 

My second year another close friend from NJ, Skott,  was added to our group.  He has been here ever since then and last week I had to say good bye. 

I've known Skott pretty much my whole life.  We met as two punk kids hanging out at the mall and going to shows in NJ. Anyone who knows Skott knows it's either a love or hate relationship. There is no one like him. He is one of the loudest most obnoxious people I have ever met. It's something I love dearly about him. Anyone who has ever been in the same vicinity as him could tell you that he demands attention and will get it forcibly if he has to.  He doesn't ever care what anyone thinks about him. He speaks his mind and isn't concerned with who it's going to offend. I adore his honestly and boldness. when most people are spending time on their image Skott is just busy being him self. that's what makes him something to be sought after.  He is famous for acting first and thinking later.  But these are all things anyone would know about him by spending 5 mins with him. 

Here are some things I have learned about him by spending close to 15 yrs with him. He never gives up on you once your his friend. He is loyal and caring. He doesn't know it but he is very very smart. I think he could be good at anything he tries to do because he puts all of his heart into it. He is one of the hardest workers I have ever known. He is always down to have fun and having him around is the life of the party.  He is my best friend and I've always had him and James close by me. They are my brothers. I  Have no idea who I would be without them or where I would be with out them. they have both help me get through harder times then I hope anyone ever has to deal with.  With out them I would be lost. 

this is the first time the three of us have really be apart and i hope it's only for a short time. 

i love you guys. 

here's the video from his band Die Slow's last show. At the beginning of it he dedicated the band to me and i cried the most!! I'm so proud of him and hope his new band on the main land does amazingly 

Die Slow - 9/3/11 @ 4Play from Jon Wong on Vimeo.

Sunday, September 11, 2011
"Christianity, if false, is of no importance, and if true, of infinite importance. The only thing it cannot be is moderately important."
C. S. Lewis
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Hey guys. I'd like to introduce you all the my next featured blogger, Amber from I Love you to the Moon. I just love her blog and all the inspiring things she has to say. You know I'm a sucker for tattoos and she has some pretty adorable ones. So I hope you go check out her blog and give her some love. 

1.What does Beauty mean to you?
Ahh. Beauty is so hard to define. Everyone has their own vision of beauty. Most define being beautiful as outward qualities – slim, muscular, long hair, dark hair, light hair, blue eyes, green eyes ect. I really have found that true beauty lies within a person. While yes, God did create some very very physically beautiful people – He is an amazing artist, a beautiful heart wins me over every time. A heart that is soft and moldable, passionate and tender is a beautiful thing.

2. Have you ever struggled with comparing yourself to other women? Can you share some of your secrets for overcoming that battle?
I have definitely struggled with this. I think almost every girl has. There is something inside of us that longs to be beautiful, desirable, and wanted. There are also so many different opinions on what beauty is, that if we allow it, it sort of throws us around and drives us a little crazy. If I tried to be what every person thought was beautiful, I would be a big huge contradiction. Instead I have to focus on who I want to be. I surely don’t want to be immodest and dress inappropriate to draw attention to what some think is beautiful. I know who I am, and I know that I am beautiful. There are so many beautiful women in this world, and it’s so neat just how beautifully different we all are! I have so many beautiful women in my life, and I’m so thankful for them. Each one has taught me something different about being a woman of God, I love that.

3. When do you feel the most beautiful, and when do you feel the most insecure?
I feel most beautiful when I focus on how beautiful I am to God. He finds me beautiful. I think that’s enough of a reason to believe it- and I do, and it makes me incredibly happy.
When I put my worth in worldly things, insecurities start creeping in. I have found that I can find my identity in nothing but God alone. Nothing good comes from seeking approval from others. It always leaves me dissatisfied with myself.
4. How do you stay confident in who you are?
I know that God created me just how I am supposed to be. I love that He finds me delightful, oh that makes my heart swell. So who am I to say otherwise? It makes me love myself even more knowing just how much he takes pleasure in me.  This verse has been pretty life changing for me and floods my heart every time I read it – “Your love delights me, my treasure, my bride.” Song of Solomon 4:10
Something about knowing that I delight my God makes me want to dance. I am his treasure. He enjoys me, wants me, and finds me beautiful. Fills my heart all the way up.

5. Any advise to girls struggling with their self image?
Focus on positive things. Be a good friend to yourself. You would never be friends with someone that consistently put you down and called you names, so don’t do that to yourself! Pick out a few things that you really like about yourself and focus on those things. At one point, I made a list of things I liked about myself. Putting it down on writing made me focus on those things and was pretty therapeutic also. I’d read it every morning and add a new item every day. For some reason it’s so much easier to pick our selves apart than to pick things we appreciate. I found it easier when I started thanking God for making me just how I am, just how He wants me, to actually appreciate all the little things about myself.


Wednesday, September 7, 2011

This family loves the beach. It's one of my favorite things about living in hawaii. Jovi is totally becoming  a beach bum. She just loves the water. I can never get enough of her adorable gummy smiles every time a wave hits her, or hows she throws her arms up in excitement and giggles when she gets splashed.  

all tuckered out after a tiring day at the beach! I wish she always napped like this. 
Thursday, September 1, 2011

So sorry I've been missing. The last week and a half has been a blur. I have, gone to a birthday party,  a going away party,  Gotten Jovi's first shots, A youth group lock in, Planned a huge surprise birthday party for jesse, Gone to a bachelorette party, planned a bridal shower, mean while working and talking care of Jovi. As a result I'm the most sick. I'm actually leaving in a few mins to go to the doctors. I just wanted to give a heads up first as to why I've been mia. 
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
 I'd like to introduce you to my next inspiring daughter of the most high, But first, I wasn't expecting this post to be taking off like it is. Its title was suppose to be a one time thing reflecting on the meaning of Pure beauty.  now that it is a weekly post I dont want to steal my friends name, so from now on it will be titled "Inside Out", because it is what goes on inside us that determines the true value of our outward acts.

And now the good stuff. 
 I'm sure some of you have already been following her blog She Breaths Deeply and for those of you who haven't been you need to!! I cant remember how I found her blog, but I as I read the news of her becoming pregnant I felt a sorta of friendship based or similarities forming.  I wanted so badly to have a friend going through the same things I was as a soon to be mommy.  Now over a year later we have both had our baby girls and I've been honored to get a glimpse into Mandy's life. reading about her faith as it strengths not only her family but all of us. 


Hello!  My name is Mandy and I run a blog called "She Breathes Deeply."  I am a tea drinking, tattoo wearing, christian yoga practicing, fashion loving, wife to a wonderful man named Kyle, and mama to a little named Lily.  I hope you come by and say hi!  

But, first… I wanted to share some thoughts I have on beauty.  

1.What does Beauty mean to you?
I used to think of beauty as an image to be portrayed or projected.  I spent so many years chasing "beauty", and trying to fit into that stereotype.  Now, I have found my beauty in becoming a mama.  I am finding my beauty in being stretched to the limit… learning to love and raise a little one without selfish ambition… giving and loving, even when I don't have much to give.  I have found my beauty being heavily dependent upon the Lord's grace.  

2.Have you ever struggled with comparing your self to other woman. can you share some of your secrets for over coming that battle.
Oh, yes.  I feel like every one has had to come to grips with the ugly competition and comparisons with other women.  I struggled with, and still do struggle with this from time to time.  But the truth is, there is only one "me."  Regardless if I am "beautiful" by the worlds standard, I LOVE my life and I LOVE the role I have been given in this life. No one else can be me. I have been perfectly handcrafted by the Lord... I learning to love being "me."  

3.when do you feel the most beautiful, and when do you feel the most insecure? 
I feel the most beautiful when I am doing the things I have been created to do… You know… Those times you find yourself doing something that just makes you "come alive" inside... and for a moment of sobering realization you find your beauty living and breathing; doing the things God created you to do.  For me, I feel most alive and beautiful when I spend time face down before my Maker… when I have a heart to heart with my husband… when I am playing with my little one… when I am offering encouragement to a friend… when I am writing, and telling my own story.

I feel most insecure when a memory of the past rears its ugly head.  Memories of allowing others dictate how I felt about myself, or what they thought of me.

4.How do you stay confident in who you are?
Staying confident in who I am is all wrapped in my identity in Christ.  I simply cannot be without Him.  The Lord has blessed me with a wonderful husband, who daily reaffirms his love and attraction to my inward and outward beauty.  Also, becoming a mama has boosted my confidence in myself as well.  It used to be I would be caught dead leaving the house with no make up on.  Now,  I am learning to love the "natural look" simply because I have no time to get dolled up with a (almost) 6 month old!  : )

But mainly, all of my confidence and self worth is wrapped up in Jesus.  He calls me lovely.

5.Any advise to girls struggling with their self image?
Please realize that the people around you who are telling you what they think about your beauty (whether they be people you know, or the media) are incredibly wrong.  I have had so many people tell me so many lies concerning beauty.  They were bitter, angry hearts that had been mistreated by the world's standard of beauty.  Your beauty is incredible, and just waiting to be unleashed.  The world needs to see and experience your beauty… 

Sunday, August 21, 2011
This week I thought I share with you some models who I adore lately and would love to one day work with.

first girl on my list....Raquel Reed. This girl is every where and it not hard to see why. I wish I knew which hair dye she uses!!

number 2... Kiki Kannibal.  She makes me wish I could pull off blond hair

and finally I just recently found this model and she is stunning. Erin Belle


Saturday, August 20, 2011
Hey guys, So are you convinced that I'm a nerd yet?? no, well in that case let me continue. 

Nerdy fact number 5: I love maps!! sit me down next to a atlas, or a globe and i'm like a kid in a candy shop. I dont know what it is about them I could just stare forever. I love knowing exactly where I am. I think it stems from me having a visual memory. I want to and must see it to know where I am and it's relation to everything else.  But I also enjoy looking at map just to know where places are. I like discovering new tiny islands and cities. 

I thought it would be fun to add some cute nerd style to back up my geekery. 

Heart Locket Necklace Map of Los Angeles, Brass Chain - Ready to Ship
I love this locket  maybe it could be a map of hawaii or NJ instead of LA

Map garland of hearts
I love the idea of map garland

I wish wallet this wasn't sold out 


Friday, August 19, 2011
I did a interview over at Kytia lamour's blog.  She does a monthly feature called Art in Transition. 
I had a lot of fun answering her questions, everything from art to motherhood.
Please check it out and let me know what you think and while you're there make sure to check out how talented she is. 


My dear blogger friend Mandy of she breaths deeply  just did a post about being burnt out.  Ohh, man this post really touched my heart. Her daughter lilly is a few months younger then Jovi and I totally remember feeling the way she does now. 

Jovi is a super spirited baby. She has always been very very attentive, persistence, focused, Intense, super attached, very needy and doesn't like to be put down.  I never had experience with other babies so she seemed totally normal to me just constant draining work. She would cry when ever she wasn't being held. people would always remark on how good she was, and I would remark back that it was because she is in my arms. She refused to sleep anywhere but on me or Jesse. I never got a break If I had to pee it meant taking her with me or hearing her cry the whole time I was gone. Even at night I wouldnt get a break because she had to snuggle up right next to me using my arm as a pillow. If i would let her she could cry for hours and not give in to sleep.   It wasn't tell people started criticizing me and my husband's attachment parenting style that I started wondering maybe Jovi's not like other babies. I was so sick of hearing people say "stop holding her so much you're spoiling her, or just let her cry she'll fall asleep eventually."  I started to feel like a failure as a mom. why was she so needy? Why were my friends babies able to occupy them selfs. I would have given anything for Jovi to be able to self sooth for even ten mins. Was it something I was doing or not doing?  Did I need to let her cry more?

can you imagine that every time you got in your car!?!? She would cry like that every single time the entire ride. I felt awful not being able to snatch her out and cuddle her. 

  I did a little research and found out that babies, like adults have many different personalities. We were lucky enough to be blessed with a spirited, or High needs baby. 

here are a few examples of what I read about spirited babies.  

"The cry of a high need baby is not a mere request, it's an urgent demand. These babies put more energy into everything they do. They cry loudly, feed voraciously, laugh with gusto, and protest more forcefully if their needs are not met to their satisfaction. Because they feel so deeply, they react more powerfully if their feelings are disturbed." - Dr Sears 

Mothers of high need babies often say, "I just can't get to him fast enough." These babies convey a sense of urgency in their signals; they do not like waiting, and they do not readily accept alternatives. Woe to the parent who offers baby the rattle when he is expecting a breast. He will let you know quickly and loudly that you've misread his cues. The concept of "delayed gratification" is totally foreign to infants, it must be sensitively and gradually taught when the child is developmentally ready to learn it.- Dr. Sears 

Spirited babies emerge from the womb knowing what they like and don’t like and they never hesitate to let you know it. They are very vocal and even seem aggressive at times. They scream for Mum or Dad when they wake in the morning.- Tracy Hogg

I was so relieved! I wasn't failing as a mother. Knowing that it was all part of her personality gave me freedom. I no longer need to try and change her. I didn't need to feel like it was wrong or spoiling her to hold her all day and sleep with her at night. She wasn't being manipulative or controlling she just needed love and physical touch. 

between the age of 3-5 months was really hard for me. She demanded all of my attention. Once i started changing my outlook on it from feeling like i couldn't do anything but hold her, to, I'm am doing the most important thing right now pouring love into my baby, things got so much better. 

Now Jovi is 7 months old and I'm having the time of my life with her. She is still a High needs baby, but she is sleeping in her own crib and now that she is crawling she doesn't demand as much time in my arms. I cherish every moment that she does knowing that she is growing up so fast and soon the day will come where she cries when I'm holding her. 

What I gained so far that was being a mom is a constant learning experience. True it's hard sometimes to know if you are doing things the right way, but trust in your self. You know your baby better then anyone else does.  Let your house fall apart, order pizza and skip that shower if you have to just know that this first year will be over in the blink of an eye. 


Thursday, August 18, 2011
hello guys, I hope you are enjoying my tattoo posts. I keep forgetting to bring my cannon to work with me so the pictures are always from my Iphone and not the best quality. 

this past week was pretty fun. I got to do so fun small tattoos. Some times it feels like all i'm dong are huge sleeves and back pieces. It's nice to be able to start and finish something in one session. 

I had to turn down a client with some really awesome yesterday just because I didn't have to time to do it. Sometimes I wish I had more time to focus on my art work. I haven't been painting at all this month. I dont know when if ever i'll find the time :( I need, well prefer to be completely alone and silent when I paint. I get totally lost in my thoughts and the time just drifts away. It a great feeling, but time is at a great shortage these days and the thought of being alone is even more rare. I know its just for a season, and i'm totally enjoying mommyhood. I just cant wait for a little more me time. 

well here's this weeks tattoo's 

this first one is on my friend Christian. He Has been bugging my for a few years to tattoo him and we finally got around to it.  He is going through some really rough trails right now and I've got to admit I wish I had his faith. He is such a strong and inspiring man of God. 

Jeremiah 29: 11-13 says, 11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

Totally one of my favorite verses of all times!! 

finally finished this one. I thought this girl moved away or something. It's a cover up that I started a year ago. I think it was pretty successful there was this big ugly vine going up the length of her back. 

I love doing sailor Jerry pieces. this was a walk in after a cancellation. what a pleasant surprise. 


Monday, August 15, 2011

So, I had the privilege of shooting my dear friend Danielle this week. I just want to start out by saying holy crap this girl has talent!! while we were driving around scouting locations she said she likes giving it her all by trying to let go of any bit of insecurities she has, so that the photographer has better pictures and less to edit. Well, that's no easy task but, she kept true to her word. 

For any girl who has modeled before you know it's not easy to just let go and not care about looking silly. Poor Danny had to feel crazy during this shoot. I know I did. that palm tree was exactly what I wanted, a perfect curve, the sun setting in the background, a beautiful ocean backdrop, only problem... it was like three feet from the busiest beach showers. That meant the whole time we were getting soaked by splashing water and tons of people were watching Danielle strike a pose. 

Meanwhile, I could have totally used an assistant. I was wearing Jovi in a baby bijorn, trying to keep my umbrellas from falling over by holding them with one foot, and trying to light meter all at once. the whole time fighting the clock against the setting sun. 

It was a challenge but I'm so stoked on the results. This was such a fun shoot and Im already planning another one with Danielle in mind. I think she has the most perfect look for a pin up model. She has that adorable ear to ear smile. 


About Me

My Photo
amy jean
happily married, two amazing children Jovi and Nixon. living my dream life in Hawaii
View my complete profile